Wednesday, March 5, 2008
Back to humdrum speed
Back to humdrum speed which is not good news. The body is so full of inflammation that I can hardly move. Inflammation everywhere--lats, abdomen, ankles, elbows, biceps, wrists, upper torso and neck. Life is so hard when I am on this damn speed. Not to mention the inflammation, it causes blood sugar crashes and sick headaches. I am completely out of control of my weight, as I have to keep eating protein to keep the sick headaches at bay. I am not very successful at that, either, but I keep trying because a migraine is the worst. Maybe I am on psychotropic drugs. I am noticing that images on the web are jumping out at me weirdly like they do when I am drugged. Oh well, no matter what, I am miserable. I am trying so hard to function. I was able to walk in the park while I composed a long letter in my head that I want to write, but right now, I am too sick to transfer thoughts to paper. Hell, for that matter, I am too sick to even have any thoughts. My brain totally blasted and nonfunctional. I will be starting work next week. Normally that would be good news, but not right now, not when I am so sick and suffering all the time. Somehow I have to to be able to hold a job no matter how impossible it seems when I am so sick and nonfunctional.
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