Depression getting worse

Depression getting worse, fantasizing about suicide, so low energy and zombie like that I can't even walk without bumping into walls. I definitely am on some kind of psychoropic causing the depression. I am just not this depressed, no matter how fucked up my life, and it is fucked up, fucked up beyond all recognizion and repair. A whole lot going on, but I am too goddamned depressed and sick to write about it. how long am i going to be fucked up on this shit? dont know. too goddamned sick and depressed to care.