In constant pain from back spasms

In constant pain from back spasms--it's so bad that it is hard to breathe.  I can barely walk, and now my lower calf muscles are beginning to stiffen in perpetual lock as my quad muscles have done for some time.  This makes me very worried because my knee, and now my ankle joints are constantly going out on me, without warning.  I am not walking right but I can't feel it, because my legs are so numb and dead.  So I fear that a joint is going to tweak way out while I am trying to walk as a semi-paralyzed woman, and break or snap some joint that will require major surgery.  I tried to walk two blocks yesterday and it felt like 5 miles.  I need to get a walker and a handicap sticker.  I am so tired of feeling that I am in the body of a 70 year old woman, but I am trying to push myself because I recognize that the forces doing this, and opposed to my well-being are too powerful not only for my little self, but for the entire world.  I have to make some changes.  My life is basically hell, but I see no way of ever escaping it.   All I can do is offer my record and let others know of the hell that is our likely future.  I have to try to find a way of inspiration for others even if I have no inspiriation myself.