Friday, February 15, 2008

After a one day respite, I woke up drugged again

After a one day respite, I woke up drugged again, forcing myself to wake and get up.  I am thinking that there is a job I can successfully obtain, but it is a morning job, and my big question is, how am I going to be able to wake up at five in the morning for five days a week?  I just have to plug ahead any way that I can.  I am in a lot of pain from the implant in my lower back, but I have to keep walking.  I am going to return my books to the library today.  I was so excited when I was on the thyroid medication because I could read again, but I absolutely cannot read when I have speed in my system--the words on the page are just are meaningless.  I am 196 pounds, and am fatter than ever.  I can't help it.  I constantly crave protein.  I want London broil steaks and double cheeseburgers. I try to walk at least a mile every day to keep my muscles in decent shape, but the quads are locked, and my knees are tender because they are tweaking out  because I can't walk properly.  I don't know how much longer I can maintain.  Hang in there, Tita

 

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