very sick

very sick--too sick to function. Even after a half hour of just sitting here I am too sick to move. I think i am on risperdol. i am suffering from congestion. Going to hhospital because i cant stand the pain. i may spend the rest of my life locked up in psych wards. one thing i know for sure--these fuckers will not be happy till they have me where they want me, which means they will never be happy vecause i despise them everything they stadn for and will wnot cooperate. am i being stupid? am i looking to spend months in a psych hospital? cant live like i am . too sick to do anything. howse a messbike has flat tire. toosick to shop or do laundry. cant read or even watch tv. just too goddamned sick.