Wednesday, November 25, 2009
Stretch marks running down both legs
Stretch marks running down both legs (been a long time since that happened), gaining weight (after I worked so hard to lose just a little bit, the goddamned luciferian fuckers caused the extra gain) all lead me to believe that once again im force fed lithium. oh, did i mention the violent suicidal ideation, the intense rages and homicidal impulses, the severe depression and mood swings? oh how about the inability to feel or relate to anything. how being drunk makes me more functional in reality than sover. been here before. i know lithium and what it does to me. i just don t know why the fuckers keep pouring it down my throate. i know now that to these mind rapists that the whole point is int the rape. these fuckers are such inhuman losers they can only feel human by destroying another person's humanity, innocence and love. and me, in all my naievte, all i can do is curl up and try to protect what i know is a soul, a lifeline to God, and not that ersatz luciferian shit they have got a significant minority believing is spirituality. i dont know how much longer i can keep going. its more than physica.l. its mental and psychological. i long just to go to sleep forever wake up in another time, when i m not brutalized, raped, chemcially poisoned and tortured. just dont see it happening soon.