Saturday, December 6, 2008

Excruciating pain today

Excruciating pain today as TPTB turned on the EMG brain implants in my head to "max", so that I could suffer debilitatingly wracking muscle spasms and pain for their amusement and my punishment. I realize now that what is happening to me is not random, but methodical, deliberate, and instructive. They plan to do to every human being what they do to me. Of course, they have an added incentive--to prevent me from self-instruction in anatomy and physiology (from a textbook I found in the street--a really excellent, comprehensive text for 200 series biology courses). I am desperate to stop the excess csf in my brain, which causes the chronic headache and nausea, and all the excessive edemic fluid in my body, not to mention the despair of my continuing weight gain. I am desperate because I cannot exercise with all the speed and emg interference with my natural body. I can barely hobble as my weak, deadened, numbed muscles find it difficult to even function.
Then there is the problem of concentration. Unlike my pre-lithium days, I have to struggle and fight to keep concepts and ideas and facts in my head. My IQ has been effectively halved by the brain implants, and that is a conservative estimate. Of course, that is assuming that I am able to read at all. Sooner or later the muscle spasms are so severe that the pain prevents my brain from being able to function at all.
The only good news is that I am starting to see the bigger picture, and may the mercy of God sustain me and protect me from all the evil that the SLI has sold me out to...

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