Struggling to do just basic things

Struggling to do just basic things--I have not been so depressed since I was a teenager. The reason for my depression is the same now as it was then--toxic patriarchy stealing my life and energy, while they try to force me to conform to meet their needs. I can say "fuck that" or "hell no" but I can't escape the drag of depression and misery that comes to a woman who insists on individuation and freedom in a toxically patriarchal world--control and abuse. I don't know--maybe I am being drugged with something in addition to the implants. All I know is that nothing gives me joy, happiness, or energy. I go to Dahn yoga to keep from becoming paralyzed with excess csf, but even that is a huge effort. It wasn't that way at first so what happened? Either Ratzinger and the gd cabal of patriarchs either added another drug to the mix or they have increased the level of the implant downloads. All I know is I am fucking miserable, I long for a life, a lover, a job, just a feeling of being normal. I have endured this GODDAMED SHIT for over 12 years, and I no cooperate or am compliant--not that it does anything about the depression.