Brief abatement in mental torture,but physically Im still a wreck.

Brief abatement in mental torture,but physically Im still a wreck. Last nite i was suffering from severe pains in abdomen as the bloating of stomach (my body didnt even want to drink water because it coulnt get out of the gut, and contributed to severe distension)put unbearable pressure on my abdominal organs. I even peed on the floor when i went to sit on the toilet and could not because the inner organs screamed at having to move and adjust, but i was in too much pain to use muscles to control my urine so i stood in silent, screaming agony while urine dribbled down my leg onto the floor. Now, my abdomen is a little happier, and mentally I am a lot more clear, but i am desperate to try to heal my back and I cannot get a break. I am in spasming pain with my lower and mid back and more than anything else, my body just needs a chance to heal but cant get it. but i have to take advantage of respite--dont know if tomorrow the goddamed rack and screws begin all over again. so God help me persever with the pain Im in--got to try to get some tasks out of the way.