Well good feeling didnt last long

Well good feeling didnt last long--my little feline friend is gone--no doubt spirited away by the Inquisitors who can't bear that I have a little happiness in life (oh, who knows--maybe they are actually humanitarian and didn't want to see the poor little thing suffer from the same drugged up shit and emf mind control manipulation that drives me mad--and I'm pretty goddamnhed strong. I'll never forget the look of outrage on the NSA man's face who visited with the police in Rio Rancho, when I suggested that he feed the dog the drugged meat that I was supposed to eat. He actually had more sympathy that the dog didn't suffer the level of poisoning that he was overseeing with me. Nothing surprising tho--the Nazis, and psychotics the world over have more sympathy for animals than humans). when I For the drugs have started up again--the same fucking headache and ddull feeling, the inability to think or carry a thought or for that matter, even feel. Mom called and I tried to be upbeat for her sake but the truth is I was faking it, lying, which is what I do som much now, as I try to pretend that I have some hope. Truth is, I don't. I realize that I have high level government operatives and politicos milking me for whatever info they can get out of me while they keep me drugged and demoralized. It's incredibly assinine if they think I don't realize what is going on--the truth is I am a level deeper than many of them which is why I know that Catholic ultra-conservatives (fascist religious zealtots) are responsible for much of what I suffer (which is why I still dream of SLI calling the shots, whereas they ceded over the reins of their goddamned Inquisition that they initiated to much higher ups and more sophisticates, a long time ago), while the politicos use me, then leaving me hanging in the wind, so the fucking fanatics can have their illusion of a saint that will save them. Dream on opus dei . Nothing I can d o but hold on to some sense of humanity that is completely denied me. Don't feel good. All fucked up on drugs. Noone to share my life and thoughts not even a little kitty.