Another nite from hell last

Another nite from hell last as I struggled, cried, and cursed with headache pain from the goddamned implants. This morning I woke up nonfuctional, (tho I am drinking coffee which is a good sign). Barely able to walk to the bathroom, face swollen, autistic, with eyes wanting to stay shut, and the persistent headaches, and ches pains. I dont think its my heart, i think its implants but i am too sick to go to hospital anyway. Once again, thrown again back into survival, functional mode. No more wanderings like yesterday, wanting to play music, hoping and praying for an intimate partner, and creative thinking. Just a new to keep eyes shut and hope pain goes away.