Body wracked with pain, psyche depressed

Body wracked with pain, psyche depressed--incredible pain last nite from fluid. today body is wracked, hurting. spine and back are completely jacked up. will go to yoga but hhonestly dont know if i can do more than childs pose. going to quit gym . not able to go to yoga. worse part is the depression. trying to pep myself up but truth is im severely depressed. i just have no energy no joy, feel drained hopeless, worthless. im so tired of feeling like shit all the time, and then on top of that to be in such terrible pain....againing weight ottoo. i wonder if all my suffering is because of the web pages i was reading last nite--about the demonic deception of nesara, th ashtar command, lady master magda, etc. or maybe it is because i hope to see dr huaman tommorew. they hate it when i see someone who recognizes and affirms me for who i am . something they can never do. dont know if i will be well enough to go. i need glasses and it would be truly wonderful to see dr huaman again but i am so fucked up i can barely walk, and so severely depresssed i doubt my ability to interact with anyone.