Halperidol

Halperidol--that is the psychotropic drug that I am being force fed by the apostate Jesuits and the evil stenchmen of the Vatican. I know my last post probably didn't make much sense--I have to apologize. I am being severely drugged on psychotropics. Thank God, I didn't travel for the holidays. As it is, this drug has me so messed up that I cannot even drive--I am barely in reality--though it helps to focus on a small patch of reality--my mind and this netbook, whereas the real difficulty is being aware of a larger reality, ie, the car in front of me, the light ahead of me, and the person making a turn--too much information for brain to process in this state. However, there is no doubt that these fucking jesuit pigs are still abducting me, and mutilating my body, and frying my brains on intense psychotropic drugs, in an attempt to make me the kind of subhuman, ungodly, (and even satanic and luciferian),apostate religionists that they are. FUCK THEM! I don't know what is going to be left of me when those fucking goddamned pigs are through, but I know that I never will trade my spirituality, sexuality, and freewill for their sterile, barren hearts, minds, and souls. Maybe it will be an opening to feel good about transcending dimensions. I have often wondered how I will feel when I look down and see myself embodied as a reptile. But I am so alienated from my own, mutilated, tortured, unnatural body that has been destroyed from its original God-given blessings, that likely it won't matter at all. If God endowed me with a reptilian etheric body, at least that is natural; this mutilated lump of human flesh I am now forced to live in, is not natural or God-given at all, and I just long to be free of it.

Of course, my intense desire for death and suicide are likely the results of the drugging. I know I am on halperidol, because my dreams (all messed up and confused, as always when I am drugged, but I still got it), told me so. My dreams also told me that Ratzinger is the mover behind it, though he is doing POS Hans bidding. In my dream I saw a black bulldog barking at me, and in my dream, I thought, "black...hmmm, I wonder if this represents the black pope." Ratzinger was known as the Pope's bulldog when he was a cardinal; now he is a bulldog for the so-called black pope. Somewhere on the web, there is a picture of POS Hans with about 7 of his closest advisors. Every one of those men, including the sole African, are full of evil, and I agree with the supposition that the entire order needs to be dissolved FOREVER. As per the link in my posts a couple of entries ago, I think both John Paul I and II, were moving towards strict censure and possible dissolution, but one was murdered, and the other nearly was. Even though John Paul II survived the bullet in his gut, the virus left in his body held him effective hostage for the rest of his life. Not only did the virus cause him to lose his intimacy with the living God (I know this, because the virus has done the same thing to me--it actually prevents one from living at a deep, contemplative and receptive level, though it still is possible to lead a life of faithful actions and behaviors, which is why I can still resist), but it also hamstrung his choices for any action. For the virus can cause widespread neurological damage and mischief (and ultimately he did develop Parkinson's), and make one appear both physiologically and mentally incapacitated to the point of incompetency. And the evil satanists and luciferians of the Vatican made it clear to him (and may have had a signed resolution by him --according to Martin Malachi's novel), that would have made it easy for him to be retired and replaced, on grounds of health incompetency, should he move against the Jesuits. So, John Paul II, knowing the Malachi prophecy, and that the end time for the Roman Catholic church is near, made the decision that he, as handicapped physically and jesuitically as he was, still was the better choice to lead the church until his death.

I am hamstrung too. I know that the aliens are involved with the evil jesuits in this most recent mutilation--and it is not the aryans. I know that I am full of rage right now, so I am trying to keep an open mind and a shut mouth, but I will repeat again what I have said before...THE ONLY ALIENS I TRUST TO HAVE TRUE BENEVOLENT RESPECT FOR HUMANITY ARE THE PLEIDIANS!!!


As for me, I have to try to struggle to live with the psychosis caused by drug. Why am I being forcefed psychotropics? Wikipedia says it best: "There are multiple reports from Soviet dissidents, including medical staff, on the use of haloperidol in the Soviet Union for punitive purposes or simply to break the prisoners' will." These evil, rotten black-frocked pieces of shit know that I am not schizophrenic. They just are trying to break my will so they can mind fuck me with greater results than they have in the past...to turn me into one of their unholy, ungodly, unembodied and alienated machine mind freaks like them.

It is going to be a bad day...all I can do in this state is watch tv. feel like shit. cant stand to be in own body or look at my now mutilated hands. pray for death. amen.

PS--Halperidol also releases excessive amounts of the female hormone, prolactin. That is the hormonal imbalance that I am feeling--the fucking pigs do everything they can to turn me into a fembot zombie their alienated, dick-dead minds can fuck via machine. GO FUCK YOURSELVES YOU FUCKING PIGS!!!