Hell night last night--kept groaning in pain from upper back, neck, head and facial congestion caused by excessive viral download. The KaBalists must have done something to my neck--either shortened it or tilted it forward, because I literally cannot walk erect, with my head up. My upper back/shoulders and/or head have to be hunched over at all times. There is no doubt that they chopped more muscle from my back. I can tell because of ever decreasing ability to fold arms into yoga's "eagle" pose. I can also tell, because it becomes harder and harder to clean myself on the toilet. This body is inhabitable. I keep longing for a male body, but I just don't know when it will happen.
I suppose I still suffer this painful hell, because I am supposed to alert and warn all I can, about the horrific spiritual enslavement that awaits all humans should MACHINE-RA and his human slave-minions prevail.
Last night, while I was in too much pain to even keep my eyes open, I had an intuitive flash why Baby Lisa's inner irises were turning milky white. She was going blind, because her brain had been hijacked by the MACHINE, and she was losing sensory interaction and input with the 3D world. That is, her eyes were no longer talking to her brain very well. Because she was so young, and her corneas still immature and susceptible to disruption, this was causing her corneas to slowly atrophy. Should the KaBalists prevail, we likely will become a planet of milky-eyed, blind, and even insensate (picture extreme, unmitigated autism) to much of reality. That cannot happen. I have to fight such a future with everything I have--even if it means relentless suffering.
So I am prepared to face another hell day. I am too sick to bear any sound of any type, except the white noise of my fans--that means no music or TV. My mouth is drooling with excessive saliva, and coated with slime. My head is filled with fluid--so much so that I have pain in my ears from excessive congestion, and pain on my jaws, which makes it hard to eat, swallow, or even keep my mouth closed. I have got some kind of weird congestion pools in my neck and on the occipital sides of my head, that causes stiff neck and sick headache pain. Of course, I cannot read or research--barely functional. Yet, I must get up today, and take a shower, and run to the store for a couple of things. Tomorrow a storm front is moving in, and I won't feel like going out at all. I keep hoping that the weather stays nice. I am too sick to ride a bike, or even venture out to try to find a shopkeeper who will REALLY fix my flat, but even so, warmer weather and bright sunshine keeps me in so much better spirit than cold and gray skies. So, I will thank GOd for the sunshine today, and try to get up and do what has to be done, and come home back to bed to lay in painful misery.