Dreamed last night that I was a "yuan"

Dreamed last night that I was a "yuan"--very important dream that I hope to work on later, but first, a caveat. My brain is not working right, at all. I have lost the normally easy access to my unconscious, and the rapid-fire imaginative process that allows me to penetrate illusion to the truth and present it in a clear and respectable fashion. I know that what is going on with my brain is the result of drugs. I know because again, I am not "feeling" music. So I am not feeling, I am not thinking, I am not imagining. I am just suffering this endless hell that is my life. So I have two choices--either I quit writing or I just write out half assed ideas without putting them to the usually stringent proofing tests that a rapid fire mind and imagination allow. I have decided to do the latter. Things are moving too fast, and I cannot risk important information and ideas falling lying fallow in a drug-blasted brain. I may be wrong, and I apologize ahead of time for poor and sloppy reasoning, but I am going to have to count on others to sift the ideas and see what pans out as truth and what is just wild speculation and conjecture. My seal of approval, my sincerity that I have been humble and thorough in my presentation, is hereby removed. I really, really hate to do that, but I don't see my life situation improving any time soon, so here goes uncensored and untested stream of consciousness. For my life situation recently just got a whole lot worst (my God it is so hard to think even in haphazard fashion; I wish I could just talk it out...the brain is just a dead zone, like my belly, where they put more inorganic implants nite before last).

I think that I dreamed that I was a yuan, because I think I have become a bargaining chip, now claimed by the Chinese, after the Jesuits decided they were out of options, and passed me on, in exchange for a solid alliance. Funny thing, to think of myself as a complete slave, bargained and bartered like a damn chip. But, as a woman at the hands of patriarchal religious men, that is exactly what I am. Of course the Chinese aren't religious, but they materialistic atheists. THEY CONTROL AND ENSLAVE EVERYONE!

You remember what I always keep saying, "THAT THE NEW WORLD ORDER IS ABOUT RELIGION." Well, the 2012 year is important, because that is the year that the race of dragons return. (I noted in my last post, that I put 2011, but I think that was a Freudian slip, because for me, the dragon return has already begun, as evidenced by the Chinese now claiming astral ownership over me--for of course the Chinese are aligned with the dragons). Now understand one thing, these dragons are reptilian, too, and they are no friend of humanity's, anymore than the 4D Aryan identified reptiles are. As a matter of fact, I think I am going to take my cue from the Pleidians who call them, "lizzies." Like me, the Pleidians understand the need to keep language simple, direct and on the humorous side. So, from now on, I will refer to "reptiles" when speaking of the Aryan affiliated reptiles, and "dragons" when referring to the Mongoloid identified aliens, and "lizzies" to describe them both. For it is their war and their conflict, that happens every 3600 or so years, when Planet X returns to Earth's orbit, that has so negatively impacted humanity. I am so close to figuring out the different histories, genetic strands and allegiances of these two competing lizard races, but I don't have the energy or the mental capacity to sustain thought right now. Just know that I, me personally, carry genetic material and astral body characteristics of BOTH races, so I have no preference for one or the other, except to say that I don't think that either really has high regard for humanity. They want to set up religions to keep us mind-controlled so that they can count on us to fulfill their needs, whether it is milking us for our hormones or eating us, as the reptiles do, or using us as foot soldier pawns in their once-in-three-millenia fight against their bitter foes.
Both races have intervened in the past, and I have to say that the dragons, as compared with the reptiles, seem a little more patronizing than predatory, but that very well could be only because the dragons are only transitory visitors here on Earth, unlike the reptiles.

Anyway the freemasons (those who have access to the occult knowledge which has been mostly lost for centuries) have known for a LONG time that the dragons would be returning and that there would be major war, as well as a major shift in consciousness and so, they have slowly been making their plans--plans for cloning soldiers (almost certainly that is what my children were bred for) of the cloned 4D reptilians themselves, plans for escape, plans for defense, plans for ingratiating themselves in with whatever ruling alien race they allied themselves with. I am losing the thread of my thought, because the luciferians Sirians come in and through a wrench in the works, but basically, I think that one component of the deal that Rahm Emanuel/David Rockefeller/Henry Kissinger made with the Chinese in Chicago was bartering the astral rights to me away.

For you see, all the bad guys assume that the dragons are going to do what they did before--come in, raise hell and kick ass of their primary opponent, the reptiles, and then leave, with a "new world order" in place for another 3600 years. But the lizzies, as well as the luciferian siriansk, have always made it an essential part of the new world order, that a mind-control religion be instituted to keep the subjects, the bulk of humanity in mental and spiritual slavery. That is why all the NWO types, no matter what they profess or with what or whom they ally, are all looking for a "religious prophet" that can be manipulated to set up the new mind-controlled religion. This is why I have been so victimized, as the Jesuits, allied with the Sirians, have picked on me. But unfortunately, this time around, they are looking for a maternal goddess figure to succor the desperate descendants of the unlucky majority of humanity destined for slavery. Valerie Jarrett made a very telling Freudian slip, and even more telling, was the look on her face when she made it. In an interview with Morning Joe before the SOTU, she made the statement, "I am African American. My DESCENDANTS were slaves." These Black people, Valerie Jarrett, and the Obamas, they KNOW what they are doing. They know that they are consigning what they regard as their specially identified people to slavery, and they have made a Faustian deal with their conscience, so that they can sleep at night and serve the masters of evil. Well, I refuse to go that route. I don't care what you do to my body or brain. My descendants are NOT going to be slaves, DAMMIT. Not as long as I can breathe a prayer or type a word. I cannot know what will happen to my physical progeny. Those who have the dark skin color of my maternal heritage are at risk of this slavery, for it skin color is a major criteria in determining who is free and who is slave. I would hope that my children fight to the death, rather than allow themselves to be enslaved but that is a choice that each one of them has to make, and maybe circumstance would relent even my staunch opposition. But I know this much. I will have spiritual children too--children who have read my writings and listened to my outcry of what it is to be human and free, that we choose and self-determine who we are in our identities, bodies, and sexualities. My children will move beyond the patriarchal system where two socially conditioned/crippled halflings meet together to form a would-be whole, but rather will be strong, androgynous individuals, whether female, male, or intersexed, who, know that their spirit is closely allied with their sexuality, and are aware of and celebrate both, so that they are creative and fruitful in whatever path of life they choose to honor.

I hope that there are no slaves in the future, and it breaks my heart to think that I will be used as a goddess figure to succor them, but I cannot deny that such plans have already been set in motion by the luciferians Borg. That is why they have chopped my body all up, just as been done in the Egyptian myths of old, and there is no doubt in my mind that they have an entire corpus of lies and falsehoods in which I encourage, nourish, and support a spiritually mutilated humanity, while they look at some goddess figure with longing for another life. Except that I don't, and won't. As long as I live, I will insist that anyone who follows me has to claim their own strength and work on their own full humanity. Right now, I am so goddamned drugged that I just go through life, barely able to function. Those men and women who buy into a mind-control religion love the weak, dependent feminine. The day before the Sirians cut my shoulders off, I was working out at the community center. And it was an unusual day for me in that I was high energy (you want to know a sure fire indicator of a spiritual person--look for someone of high energy who is capable of multi-tasking and pushing agendas--its either ego or spirit that moves the person, and it will be very clear which). When I am high energy, I try to do my workouts in doubletime, because I got other things I need to do. So I was humming slong, my spirit moving my body, and there was a sullen, angry middle aged Hispanic male watching me (NOT a luciferian, but of the type vulnerable to mind control religion). Do you know what was wrong with him--why he was so angry that I had the deep spiritual energy to move my life along with ease? Because for all his gray hair, he still was living out his infantile fantasy of wanting a mommy who was only there for him, and the sight of me, living my own life out purposefully, pulled out the infantile rage that our mind controlled,patriarchal religionist society had kept festering hidden in his unconscious for decades--"mommy isn't there for me." Well the luciferian plant was monitoring the sullen boy in a man's body, and reported back to his superiors. That night my shoulders were chopped off ("bad mommy, that will teach you to focus only on me"). I learned a long time ago that when I am severly depressed and dependent, that I can count on a lot more positive attention from men (as a matter of fact, I think that the traditional patriarchal feminine norm is one of that of depression). Well, I sure am depressed and dependent now, on whatever fucking drug I am on that is draining all my energy and lifeforce, but I know that there are strong SPIRITUAL people in the world, ready and willing to do the hard work of psychological and spiritual individuation. Those are the descendants who will thrive in the future. And I know that a depressed and dependent state of being is not spiritually mature or life-giving, nor psychologically healthy. I want to be a strong intersexed person in the body of a woman, but I want to be around strong men, not patriarchal boys in men's bodies, raging in infantile desire for a mommy, or a "lady" or any other projection of their psyche that they can control. Be strong enough to relate to me as an individual, not a halfling, because the drugs are artifically depressing me now, but sooner or later, God willing (and death is the only other option), I will live out the fullness of my strong, healthy, fully individual feminist woman again. I spent the first 20 years of my life living in a patriarchal society, and I see clearly how rigidly maintained gender roles warps the characters of both men and women. I will not impose on someone else's identity, but I know what it is to be a spiritually free person, and I will not compromise my life to fit someone else's projection. That is idolatry.

But getting back to the present. I think the Sirians had tapped the Jesuits and their institutional structure to set the stage for the next epoch's mind control religion, and yours truly was the designated avatar. Except that Tita don't play idolatry games. I don't want to be the avatar prototype of godless, bloodless celibate men. I want to be a full human being, in communion with my body, my God, my Earth, and all those who cross my path. Furthermore, I think the Vatican/Jesuits are reeling, because the Forces of Good have been so successful, so I think that in Chicago, I was passed onto the Chinese (that is why I dream I am a yuan) for their avatar. For the Chinese have every intention of being the great world power for the next 3601 years or so. The dragons are their natural allies, and they are moving into place. However, they have one great drawback--they are not a deeply spiritual people. Lao Tsu aside, they do not have much of a tradition for mysticism. Confuciansism was a pragmatic religion of the Law, and the Communists are materialistic atheists. The next epoch will be deeply spiritual. Everyone knows that, even the Chinese. No doubt that realization played into their conquest of Tibet. For what is Tibet? It is a barren, cold, mountainous land---ah, but it is a land of mystics, and as soon as Mao Zedong got a whiff that there might be something to Shambhala and this mysticism thing, Tibet was doomed. But the Chinese ruling class really despises the Tibetans--they despise all religions, including of course, Christianity. But I guess that since they know that I have the same dragon blood that runs through their veins, they think that they can use me in the same way that the Jesuits hoped to use me. For even though I keep talking about the upcoming war between the lizzies, the Sirian/Agarthan threat is the long term one, and religion will be an essential part of the next world order.
Sorry, mind isnt working right; unfortunately that is the way my posts will be from now until I feel more like a human being--something i don't see for a long time...