Oh, the Sirians and their mind games

Oh, the Sirians and their mind games--now they have got my metabolism so screwed around that I cannot stay awake at night. Instead of my normal routine in which I am sluggish and slow in the morning, gaining energy and boost, as the day goes along, peaking in productive creative thought after 10 pm, I now have my highest energy levels in the morning. Actually, it is a pretty mediocre energy level, but over the past two days, I definitely have peaked in energy in the morning. It messes up my whole routine. I like to be more passive in the morning, reading my "morning paper", and thinking on things all day, then writing at night. Now, I am so tired at night, and my brain quit working about 5 pm. This is all a result of my honest answer about my sleeping habits. Fucking Sirians just like to make me miserable. I am no longer quite so sick and dysfunctional as before, but I still am very autistic. I find myself like the period when I wanted to "shake"--which helps clear my head and energy meridians. I am nowhere near my usual energetic self. Oh well. I tried to call my mom, but no anwer--I have picked up they are playing mind games vis a vis her as well. One thing that has changed is that my daughter, who lived in the duplex next to me has gone, or may "has been disappeared". I was always very careful not to let on that I knew it was one of my daughters living next to me. I was worried for her safety, and I feared that if I let on, I might put her in danger. All for naught. She was not only protected by the bad guys--the Plejarans, SHE WAS PLACED THERE TO SERVE THEIR EXPRESS PURPOSE OF HONEYTRAPPING ME, and now she is gone. She is highly telepathic, much more telepathic than me, and so she knows what I think of the Plejarans, as I am sure she was in my mind while I wrote my last post. I am a little worried about her. My guess is that she off somewhere being reprogrammed. All I can do is send out a prayer for all my children, wherever they may be. I wish them well. Really, I wish everyone well. I saw a Black drone giving me a hate stare when I went to pick up my fiornal today, and I glared right back, pissed off, because I am more suspicious than ever that it was Black soldiers' dereliction of duty that led to the escape of the Plejarans from "Ionstranka". I know that they thought they were righting a grievous injustice, and for a long time I told myself not to pass judgment, because I didn't know the circumstance (though my own career experience has taught me that many Blacks are uncomfortable exercising authority--which includes following and implementing orders and protocol from one's superiors). But I was not in a good mood earlier, worried about my children, and pissed off at myself, that I, like so many other liberals, left myself open to guilt tripping about an honest evaluation and judgment being slandered as racism, and so I let him have it (I can cuss out telepathically...). But when I got in my truck, I realized that blame and anger is not going to do anybody any good. The Black drones of the Borg are victims as much as any one implanted by the MACHINE, and I am not going to help unplug them by cursing them. I have been afraid for some time, though I never voiced it out loud, that the future of the Black drones is to be tall Greys. I don't want that. I don't want that for anyone. I suspect (maybe hope) that many of the White military who were plugged in as drones, have been able to get unplugged, but the same sense of grievous injustice and "nurturing bitterness and resentment" that led the Black drones to be vulnerable to the Sirian manipulations in the first place, is going to make it very difficult to take the steps necessary to unplug. In short, they are not going to believe anyone who tries to talk them out of the prison of "resentment and bitterness" that the Sirians have built for them, and reassured them, that they understand and hold the key. They have been so fooled. They don't understand how they have been played by the Sirians, and they think "The Matrix" is a harbinger of some post-apocalyptic, Black-dominated utopia. It is hell, a lie, a grand scale deception--the Sirians are master agents of deception, and they always twist things just a little bit--"wrap the truth in a lie", and they choose and pay their screenwriters well.

Oh, the Sirians are master psychologicts and manipulators of reality. They infiltrated both White and Black military, turned members of both races into drones and set them off against one another, creating chaos, and a sense that one side could be trusted against another. Even I was fooled for a long time. I thought that the Nazis would never have anything to do with Blacks, and so I always regarded and trusted them as the good guys, potential liberators, except that, despite their knowledge of what was happening, they never did anything at about it at all, but get in my mind and play mind games with me. Because I knew that the cabal planned for destruction of nearly all people of color, they had my deepest sympathies. I was with them and what I perceived to be their agenda all the way. But they were dupes themselves. Oh yes, it is true that the Sirians plan to kill nearly all people of color, but they have no respect for any human. They have no more regard for Rhesus Monkey Alpha (that's me), than they do for Black drone. We are all inferior to them. They just want to use us. Me--I'm designated as female avatar; the Black military are their muscle men, who they can also use to inflame racial tensions.

Even though multiple contacts with them has never led to a word or even a smile, I knew that they wanted me to go with them, but thank God for my intuitive self which told me that something was fundamentally awry with their values and manly virtue. For those who think this is racist, let me assure you that I thought the exact same thing about the White drones. The only difference was that I knew immediately something was wrong with the White drones, and very quickly identified them as Borg slaves, but a reverse and positive racism ("the Nazis would never have anything to do with the Blacks", and vice versa), just led me to regard them as with the deep unease and lack of regard that I could not name until recently.

Why do I write this--in hopes that somewhere, some Black reader can figure out a way to reach these people to get them unplugged. I don't think that they would listen to me, but we, as in all of humanity, need them in the fight against the Machine, and their future is very grim if they stay with the Sirians. Actually, the future for all of us is very grim--nothing for it on my part but prayers and good will. I just wish that I had my usual energy.