Trying to write

Trying to write, but find that my brain is no longer capable of thinking out an idea. Brain is totally empty. and it is too hard to try to get it to stay on task. Very different from normal self, when my brain is constantly teeming, thinking, trying out different hypotheses. I know i would feel better if i took testosterone, but i am sick of trying to cover up the lie of the true horrible brain lobotomy that the sirians did to me by switching my hormonal system. For first time in my life, i know what it is to struggle to understand concepts, to have a very mediocre !Q. Sad thing is, I have no energy to care. Just dragging thru life, trying to walk up and down aley a few times to try to slow down weight gain, --i can't even keep thoughts in my head to wriete this.