Wednesday, July 7, 2010

More shit from the fucking goddamned assholes

More shit from the fucking goddamned assholes. Stupid pricks tampered with my heavy metal detox--which costs a hundred dollars a bttle. Dr. Huaman today told me, " YOu are your own doctor." Good thing I am--if I hadnt fought for my life and my health at every step of the way against the assinine MD's of the alphabet agencies and the institutions my insurance paid for, I would be dead if lucky, and insane if not!! Instead I am just broke--broke finanacially, and broken in health, mind and spirit, and yet the bloodsuckers still continue their goddamned mind games with me. Most immediately distressing is that they tampered with the heavy metal detox that I was taking, and which made me (in my intestines) feel dramatically betterthe very first time I took it. I could tell the difference immediatelyh. But as with every treatment, situation, and human being that makes me feel better, they have to taint it, tamper with it, destroy it. They are only interested in a schizoid mind-controlled robot to help them destroy and enslave humanity for their evil and satanic masters.
I AM AUTISTIC, GODDAMN IT! I WAS BORN THAT WAY! I have to struggle to stay present in physical reality and socially interact with others. I cannot handle the everyday heavy metals without a bunch more poison put in me by the constant efforts of fucking sold out Pibs (pricks in black) who are paid to monitor my every move.

And I have spent most of the day very autistic. At Dr. Huaman's office, they drugged me up with eye drops (three instead of two), but as often happens when I am in an autistic state, I am not aware of what is happening at the time but only afterward. But even though I had wanted to be presented in social interaction, I just wasnt there. Dr. Huaman was angry with me, because of my stubbornness and the fact that I won't have surgery on my eye that is going blind. My body has never recovered from the implants of the first surgery. I shudder to think of what would happen in round 2. I long to get my body in some kind of physical fitness health again. No more surgery until that happens, and if it never does, I go blind. My body and life aint worth a shit anyhow. THe bottom line is that I am not having any more surgery of any kind until I have some kind of emotional support. I am tired of having to do everything myself, not able to depend on anybody for anything, not having anyone to talk to, or minister to me when I feel all fucked up as I do right now with my back muscles screaming in spasm over the poison the Pibs put in my detox medication. I am tired of being locked away in autistic isolation all the time. I need a partner. I need support. And until its there, I am just a jacked up piece of shit that these PIBs can do their medical experiments on. Well do it you stupid fuckers. But dont expect any cooperation from me.

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