such a long post

such a long post to start a nite of sheer hell once fucking agin. have to take vicodin--brain is rushing--cant stand it--maybe lithium--certainly belly looks expanding. brain all fucked up. worse is fucking goddamned smell. smelled it earlier in truck--is it metholated cinammon? dont know what you call it--it is nasty and gross beyeond belief--hard to write---arms numb from viral implants--major knockout time.