Sunday, August 7, 2011

I am starting to feel concerned

I am starting to feel concerned about the recent turn of events. I have been so low testosterone all day that I am not able to think very well. However, I am really being socked by the viral download, but once again, my inner voice tells me not to trust what is going on. In my last post, I asked for blessings on the Patriot Leadership Team, but now I am not so sure that there is a team, but am wondering if the military, specifically the Navy/Faction 2 military has pulled off a de facto coup. If so, that is disastrous for this country and humanity's future, and not something that I can support. I do not have the deep respect for Faction 2 that some in the alternative community do. I regard them the way I regard Catholics and the Catholic Church, which is to say that yes, there may be good individuals, but I think both institutions are corrupt to the core, as well as the primary power brokers of them. Just as I no longer affiliate myself with the Catholic Church, I do not feel comfortable with the Templars/ I have seen a few of the Faction 2/Knights Templars people, and they give me a yucky feeling. They are the human agents who got Salusa to chop up my body, because they have no respect for the civil liberties of gay and lesbian people (they did not castrate me--the reptiles did that). They have constantly ignored my pleas and tears, and deny my human free will over the most basic of my rights--that of sovereign ownership of my own body. Nope--those values do not reflect or honor the spiritual and free vision of humanity for which I yearn.

I am not yet positive of what is going on, but I know enough that my inner voice that is still telling me to resist any interdimensional activity has to be listened to. Yet, clearly Faction 2/military people, as well as the lemurian psychic neighbors are quite confident in their assumption that I "belong" to them. So, again, the question is, what am I doing/saying in my sleep, or better yet, what is some controlled, immature aspect of my psyche saying? I don't know, because I am on some kind of psychotropics that prevent me from remembering my dreams, and the high estrogen that I am constantly force fed makes sustained thought difficult. I don't know. When I am this messed up, all I can do is wait to see what pans out. In the meantime, until I get clarity, I have to continue to resist any abduction.

I have said it before, and I will say it again--the political person I absolutely and completely embrace for the transformative future of this country is Hillary Clinton. It does not bother me if Joe Biden is the de facto president--after all, that would be the clear constitutional transition. But is Biden a free agent or is the military/Faction 2 in command? I am sitting on some information that I don't want to reveal, because I have no desire to sabotage a leadership team, with Hillary Clinton as a respected and empowered member, but I am uneasy that such may not be the case. So much going on, and I fear that once again, I just am being used to further some fantasy projection of some patriarchal men. Nothing for it, but to wait and see. I may have doubts, but nothing I just wrote is hard set. I have got to get control of my life somehow...

In the meantime, I need to go back and edit my previous posts. That was one indicator that set off alarm bells. Rereading my previous posts reminded me of the edits that the Jesuits used to make in my writing to reflect a more favorable attitude to the Church and a heterosexual identity. I know that since getting the virus in my right hemisphere, I suffer from some kind of grammatical dyslexia, but when I see repeated glitches (edits?) that confirm the same misleading notion about my sexual and gender identity, I get suspicious. Deal with life one day at a time.

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