Wednesday, August 31, 2011

I woke up in extreme pain and suffering

I woke up in extreme pain and suffering. too sick to read "morning paper". the fuckers have cut so much on my neck that i cannot hold it up. every muscle in body spasmed and paineful. neck is worst though. there is no way i can function like this. house is a mess, need to get service guy here to fix abathtub leak, but too sick to even clean house. arms are numb. think i am going to have to spend all day in bed, wishing for death. no doubt stupid fucking jesuits behind this shit. want their girel child saint. i cant even shut my mouth--cranial facial alignment so off. i know only option is a gender change. just spend my time visualizing it. when time is ready it will happen. in meantime i have to endure suffering. endured severe suffering before--just have to offer it up for good, and curse the religious fascist pigs responsible.. doesnt matter. they have never gave a fuck about me. everything i have had to figure out on own. sitll the same. going to lay down. try not to take vicodin. a ll i can do.

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