Getting fatter and fatter no matter what I do--fucking doesnt matter what i eat or if I exercise. too fucked up today to exercise. think i am on fucking lithium again. brain was rushing last nite. found it really hard to sleep though i may have been contacted by helpful aliens--we were trying to establish a protocol of communcitation--i remember a star trek voyager where they communicated via images of games.
I sure hope helpful aliens are on way, for very soon i am not going to be alive. under no circumstances will i choose to serve the evil fucking aliens or their controllers, including the two evil factions that keep batting me around--knights templar and luciferian Vatican hierarchs.
At this point, I just want to fucking die. I dont want to be in this fucked up mutilated body anymore. and I sure as hell aint ascending with a bunch of evil aliens.
Trying to make sense of what I read, and know i wanted to write something but brain cant fucking work when it is all drugged up. too fucked up for anything--go watch tv--all i can do--that and gain pound after pound. think im on lithium--for the 200th time. fucking goddamned moronic idiots that dont know shit. stupidass psych hacks. know what iwanted to say. think i am being given hemp oil and it made me severely atuistic. dont know if it was because of hemp oil or because they increased viral load. all i know is that at this point cant recommend it. there may be something beneficial to it, but it looks very similar to black oil that the motherfuckers use to carry the virus into body. Not feeling well. worried. not much i can do anout it. wish i were dead god, i wish i were dead.
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