I woke up with a relatively clear head for the first time in days--that means the fucking pricks that bombard me with psychotropic drugs have given me a day off---sorta. Instead, I am force fed huge amounts of estrogen to offset the large testosterone in my body. No one listens to me--I FUCKING HATE THE FUCKING ESTROGEN IN MY BODY. I HATE THE WAY IT MAKES ME FEEL--PHYSICALLY, EMOTIONALLY, MENTALLY. You fucking pricks have destroyed my body and my self-identity, my pride in myself as a woman. Guess what, you fuckers--THE THOUGHT OF BEING FEMALE IS NOW LOATHESOME TO ME-NOT LEAST OF ALL, BECAUSE THAT IS ASSOCIATED WITH SLAVERY TO YOUR FUCKING PATRIARCHAL VIEW OF ME. I DESPISE YOU RELIGIONIST FUCKING SONS BITCHES WITH EVERYTHING I AM.
I know that a lot of my anger and unhappiness is caused by the goddamned excess estrogen, which is not natural or native to my body at all. I just wonder if I am ever going to feel like a human being again. No time for speculation., After losing 3 or 4 days to the fucking Jesuit pigs who drugged me, I have to get up and move. I hate my life, I hate my body, I hate most of all, the way these fucking religionists see me. I wish to God I could be me--A MAN, and get rid of those fucking leeches hanging onto me.