Monday, June 20, 2011
My God--it just hit me---I have been so stupid
My God--it just hit me---I have been so stupid...I honestly believe that the same goddamned pigs who have been involved in my mutilation have been putting me through some kind of hazing. LOL. Who knew??? The goddamned "psychics union" is homophobic. I knew the brothers' branch were, but now I realize why God was trying to get my attention regarding Casey Anthony. I am the silent, abused patsy, being used and abused by high stakes emotional manipulators, who could never accept me as I am, but had to carve me up like a goddamned turkey, so that I met their standards of a "real woman" that matched their wet dream fantasy/ Well guess what assholes? I HATE THE WAY YOU SEE ME!!! I will never be able to develop a working relationship with a gang of men who stood by and did NOTHING while I was systematically abused and mutilated for over six months. I hate THE GODDAMNED PSYCHOTROPIC DRUGS YOU FORCE ON ME, AND I HATE THE G0DDAMNED FEMALE HORMONES THAT I AM FORCE FED, THAT HAVE GOT ME SPITTING UP EVEN NOW, AND I HATE THE GODDAMNED BODY THAT I AM IN, and I sure as hell AM NO LONGER COMPLICIT WITH MY ABUSERS, WHETHER BY OMISSION OR COMMISSIOM. Take your goddamn hazing and shove it up your fucking ass!!! I am not interested. Thanks to your goddamned complicity, I will have months, if not years of work, before I am ready to trust another human being again. First I will look for work (you think I am one of your goddamned players--I don't care what I do), then I will have a double masectomy, so that at least I can tolerate being in this fucked up mutilated body that God did not give me, but rather a bunch of fucking psychic and spiritual rapists did, and finally I will try to find a lesbian lover who can somehow help heal and love me, after the nonstop abuse, rape and trauma I have endured for the last eight years. I have no intention of giving solace to any patriarchal males under any circumstance ever again, and guess what, psyhics---not a one of the psychic males I have encountered meets my criteria of Manhood, so you can stop remote viewing me, and give on the goddamned hazing--I DON'T WANT TO JOIN YOUR FUCKING, SEXIST-PIG, ABUSIVE GANG!!! I have to try to heal, from all the trauma that you sons of bitches have done to me!!!!